SHAVED HEADS!!!!

So yesterday I had a really bad day. A lot of my frustration was stemming from doubt that is always in my mind. This mostly stems from my education. In science, I was trained to be skeptical and always look for concrete evidence before any conclusions can be made. This is hard when it comes to faith because the point of faith is to believe without having evidence. Anyways, doubt was winning yesterday. I was doubting God and doubting myself.

At circuit riders that afternoon, the lecture was on unbelief. What it is and how to get rid of it. Unbelief makes up it's own mind about God, and it finds it's own methods for doing God's work. It talks to itself more than it talks to God. Unbelief is a sin and the world is full of it. It is a norm in Western society to be skeptical. But unbelief fears; God does not. Faith believes.

During the whole time at circuit riders I was so pissed. I was so mad. You know how stubborn I can be. I was just having none of it. And when we rebuked the sin of unbelief I totally did not take it to heart because something inside of me didn't want to let go of it. It is safe and comfortable.

But somehow I got my head screwed back on today and managed to swallow my pride (which is another sin I need to rebuke) and at THOP Hannah, Hannah and I rebuked unbelief and declared that it be cast it out of my life. And then Johanna came over and gave me a bible passage - Revelation 21: 1-7.  Verses 6 and 7 really hit me: 'He said to me: "It is done. I am the Alpha and the Omega, the Beginning and the End. To him who is thirsty I will give to drink without cost from the spring of the water of life. He who overcomes will inherit all this, and I will be his God and he will be my son."' This was really encouragin. I thing I have been trying to DO things to get God to come to me, but I don't have to! He doesn't require that! He will come to me anyways. So I need to 'Be still and know that He is God' - Psalm 46:10.

I also got a really great encouragement message from one of my best friends back in Calgary, Emily. She said that she has been reading my blog and that she is praying for me all the time. This means so much to me. Emily is such a wonderful friend and such a blessing on my life. She also said that even though I was experiencing a dry spell, she could tell just from looking at photos of me on facebook that God has been making changes in me. I look different. Even from the other side of the world people can see that I am changing. Woah.

At the circuit riders lecture today we did a sort of prophesying exercise. We got into groups of 3 and asked God for some characteristics of each person's original design. And we asked for Him to reveal an assignment that has been placed over our lives that is preventing us from deeper relationship with God. So I got prophesied over first. I was with Hannah R and Kat. These were God's words for me about my Original Design:
- I am God's bride: he CHOSES me, he LOVES me and he WANTS me!
- He delights in me: he loves me for me and not for what I do
- I am passionate: I always go all out on everything. I want to fully understand things and get down to the nitty gritty. And He said that this is a gift that He gave me and I should not try to ignore it, but use it.
- I am genuine: I am authentic and real and ME
- Tree: Strong, Rooted, Animals in the Branches. I am strong and stable and a shelter for others. I am safe and I am a ROCK.
- Pine tree: Beautiful natural fragrance that God delights in
The assignments on my life that were revealed were:
- The enemy wants me to believe that my words can't and won't have an impact on other people. This relates to self worth.
- My independence: I am afraid to depend on others because I am afraid to trust in them. So I tend to only put myself in a position where I rely on myself and no one else. God wants me to trust and depend on him.

I also prophesied over Kat and Hannah. It was really neat because random things would come into my head that I thought were dumb and meant nothing, but when I told them to the girls they were excited and the things were meaningful. Especially when I was prophesying over Hannah, words and visions just popped into my head that I knew were not my own thoughts. Yay God. All I had to do was get rid of unbelief.

Just now, as I am writing this, Miranda prophesied over me. She said that I am a Mother figure. This doesn't surprise me. People always say that I am like their mom or remind them of their mom and other such things. I really don't like being a mom. I wish I could be the kid and have someone else take care of me, but I guess God always calls us to do things we don't necessarily want to do. But it is true. She said I have a certain authority over kids and over people in general, and they listen to me. But I am humble in my authority and do it with grace and compassion. She also said that she saw a picture of a compass. I am a leader and I lead people wherever God tells me. Cool yo.

This evening was super exciting because we got pizza from Dominos and they had GLUTEN, DAIRY, EGG FREE CRUST. Aweee yeah! I got pizza! WOOOHOOOOO. I love food. I also got to go to the super market and get some snackies, yummmmm gluten free vegan cookies! And one of the guys from the Taurunga DTS named Simon lent Hannah R and I his two-for-one card for Coffee Club, so we got some yummmm lattes. I secretly love Simon and he knows my name. Maybe we will get married. Also, I hope he doesn't read my blog.... we are fbook friends....

After supper my Outreach team decided to do our undercuts!!!!! So Rich pulled out the shaver and revealed his fantastic barber skillz. Hannah H went first. I am so proud of her. She has beautiful, long, waistlength wavy brown hair and she didn't even cringe when it happened. It is just a small strip on the left side of her head. Then I went, then Van, then Beth and Eleisha and other Jacob. We are so cute now with our bald stripes on our left sidesssss.

My cute bald spot