Oh the sniffles

This morning our whole cottage managed to miss our alarms, so we were all late for 'breakfast'. Now there is a new rule that if you are late for breakfast, you have to do the dishes... I hope I don't miss my alarm too often!

I say 'breakfast' because we didn't actually get breakfast today, as this morning was a fasting morning. Today we fasted for a revelation of God's intimacy. So instead of eating, we pray. I read a few verses in the song of songs... i think it was chapter 8 verse 1-8... something like that. Anyways, I prayed hard. I have been praying so much here, and yet I never feel anything. I have been prophesied over, and prayed over and have been praying so much, and I have yet to hear anything in response from God and I have yet to feel anything in my body. I see everyone else falling to their knees weeping, or laughing hysterically while in prayer, and I feel nothing. I have been getting so discouraged because I just want to feel something or see something or hear something so badly to prove that all my prayers are not going unheard.

One of the first things Josh Cole said this morning was 'wether we feel God or not, he is still worthy of our praise and worship. The motivation of prayer and worship should not be for some amazing revelation, it should simply be that God is worthy. Any revelation is a bonus that may or may not happen.' Ok, fine. I can handle that. But then Josh got us to get a partner, and he gave us 60 seconds to listen to what God had to say about them. Ummmmmm, ok? Well, needless to say all I saw was nothing. What a disappointment.

I was feeling so discouraged and angry and frustrated with myself. I don't know what I am supposed to do in order to hear God, and Josh is supposed to be teaching me just that. And I still have no clue. I told Carly that I was so frustrated and such and she said 'That's good! Get fired up! That is what God wants!' Gah! Jeeze. Ok fine. I will just keep trying.

But at the end of the lecture time, Josh put on the song 'Favourite One' by Misty Edwards.
'Jesus, here I am your favorite one
What are You thinking, what are You feeling?
I have to know
For I am after Your heart
I'm after Your heart
I'm after You'
I kneeled on the ground and put my face to the carpet. I sang the words to the song. I thanked God for his love. I told him that I love him. I told him that I am ready to give everything to him. I am ready to love him as Mary did. I am ready to give him my inheritance, my life. And I thanked him for his love, because I do not deserve it. 
Suddenly I got this image of Jesus and I started to cry. And I just cried. And said Thank you God, I love you. 
God finally gave me a revelation of his love and how it feels to be intimate with him. Finally. Finally I heard him. Praise God. He is so Beautiful and his love is so Amazing.
What a morning.

After that we broke-fast with a lovely meal of noodly stuff, and....... GLUTEN, EGG and DAIRY FREE MUFFINS! YUMMMMMMM! Finally something delicious to eat :)

After lunch, for community outreach, Hannah, Jacob, Henk and I went to a coffee shop in Matamata and serenaded the coffee loungers. It was so fun :)

Noemi went somewhere else on outreach, and they made her clean a toilet. Apparently she had never cleaned a toilet before (even though her duty last week was to clean the one in our cabin!). She got caught. And God payed her back for skipping out on her duty, because the toilet on outreach was WAY grosser than the one in our cabin. Ha!

Also, so exciting, we finally finished Start Trek, the Prince of Egypt and Tarzan! So now we can start a new movie without feeling so overwhelmed with unfinished movies!

Instead of star gazing after the movie, we went star spinning. It was hilarious. You just spin fast while looking at the stars and then when you are good and dizzy, someone flashes a flashlight in your face and you collapse. It is hilarious :)

The only downside of today is that I think that I may be coming down with a cold. My nose is sniffly and my voice hurts lots. I also am sort of grumpy. Some old lady tried to tell me how to wash the dishes and I was so mad! Ughhh. I know how to wash dishes. Geeze. Anyways, I think that my anger was a result of illness or exhaustion. Not sure which... either way I should really get to sleep! And hope that I don't sleep through my alarm again in the morning!

The cows are also still having loud, disgusting sex. Or dying. I have not seen any baby cows, so I am thinking they are not giving birth...